


all you have to do

by starssshine



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Aromantic Asexual Pidge | Katie Holt, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Chatting & Messaging, F/F, Gay Adam (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Gay Shiro (Voltron), Gender-Neutral Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Lesbian Allura (Voltron), Lesbian Romelle (Voltron), M/M, Wild Miscommunication, the plot is questionable but it's entirely self-indulgent so let me live
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-28 14:54:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19396459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starssshine/pseuds/starssshine
Summary: samurai:well this is quite awkward but. hi, yes, you gave me your number at the coffee shop and I only just now realized. the thing is, I don’t like girls, so.sharpshooter:i’m sorry but what the fucksamurai:uh. is this the girl from the coffee shop?sharpshooter:no it is not, my friend! who are you?samurai:what the hellin which allura tries to set up lance with a cute boy, and things escalate.





	all you have to do

**Author's Note:**

> a few notes:  
> -the squad all goes to arus university, except for hunk, who goes to balmera. hunk comes and hangs out though.  
> -the basic idea is that in this story, everyone in arus has a code/number that they can give to people and use it messaging. however, it isn't just arus exclusive, so hunk has one too because he misses his friends.  
> -pidge is non-binary, but is still considered male, so they room with keith.  
> -allura is a lesbian and dating romelle (also a lesbian).  
> -lance is trans and bisexual, his roommate is helpfully unnamed.  
> -keith is gay as fuck.  
> -shiro isn't that important but he's dating adam and they are both arus grad students
> 
> i think that's all! this was originally written as a warm-up for camp nano and i ended up liking it, so, enjoy!!

october 3

9:43 pm

 **samurai:** well this is quite awkward but. hi, yes, you gave me your number at the coffee shop and I only just now realized. the thing is, I don’t like girls, so.

 **sharpshooter:** i’m sorry but what the fuck

 **samurai:** uh. is this the girl from the coffee shop?

 **sharpshooter:** no it is not, my friend! who are you?

 **samurai:** what the hell

9:45 pm

 **samurai:** help

 **pidger:** what now

 **samurai:** so apparently

 **samurai:** that girl that gave me her school number user thing at uhh that coffee shop? the one about the lions?

 **pidger:** mhm

 **samurai:** apparently this is Not her number

[samurai has sent an image]

 **pidger:** that’s a Big Fat Oof

 **samurai:** thanks for the assistance

 **pidger:** what’s her name?

 **samurai:** uhh it was a-something

 **samurai:** allure?

 **pidger:** allura?

 **samurai:** that’s it

 **samurai:** is that fact important?

 **pidger:** nope not at all lmao good luck

 **samurai:** ,,,, k

9:52 pm

 **sharpshooter:** hey fam not to be rude but what the fuck is happening

 **samurai:** oh

 **samurai:** well it’s kind of a long story

 **sharpshooter:** well i’m procrastinating studying for exams

 **sharpshooter:** enlighten me

 **samurai:** well I was just at this coffee shop, it’s got lions in the name idk I can’t remember

 **samurai:** and this nice girl was my barista

 **sharpshooter:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **samurai:** and I am, in fact, quite gay

 **sharpshooter:** ah lit

 **samurai:** but this girl gave me her user for this platform

 **samurai:** and I was so afraid bc I thought I was going to have to let her down but I guess I clearly have the wrong numbers or smth

 **sharpshooter:** that’s wild

 **samurai:** yeah I know right

 **sharpshooter:** well should we like,,,, introduce ourselves?

 **samurai:** I suppose

 **samurai:** how do I know that you aren’t some creepy sixty year old man

 **sharpshooter:** well i am, in fact, also on arus university’s chat platform so i feel like that should be a clue

 **samurai:** oh.

 **samurai:** well I’m 19 and obviously at arus u

 **sharpshooter:** woah omg same

 **sharpshooter:** you can call me leandro, i’m cuban, and bisexual

 **samurai:** well, i’m akira, i’m japanese, and gay

 **sharpshooter:** nice to meet you, akira

 **samurai:** this is the weirdest fucking way to meet someone

 **sharpshooter:** actually no

 **sharpshooter:** i have some Stories

 **samurai:** I’m both terrified and intrigued

 **sharpshooter:** well, i work at a coffee shop, right, and there was this one girl one time, super cute

 **samurai:** can’t relate

 **sharpshooter:** but she asked me on a date right

 **sharpshooter:** I Was Hand-Cuffed! Police Were Called! Not Clickbait!

 **samurai:** we’ve only just met I don’t need to know your sex life

11:02 pm

 **samurai:** pidge

 **pidger:** keith

 **samurai:** i think we’re friends now

 **pidger:** what the fuck

11:05 pm

 **pidger:** ALLURA

 **princessa:** PIDGE

 **pidger:** I HAVE SEVERAL QUESTIONS

 **princessa:** SHOOT

 **pidger:** FOR ONE, WHY DID MY ROOMMATE GET YOUR NUMBER AT A COFFEE SHOP, LAST I CHECKED YOU’RE LESBIAN AND IN A RELATIONSHIP

 **princessa:** WHAT

 **pidger:** MY (GAY) ROOMMATE WAS GETTING COFFEE FROM YOUR STORE AND APPARENTLY YOU GAVE HIM YOUR NUMBER AND IT WASN’T EVEN THE RIGHT ONE?????

 **princessa:** OH YEAH THAT

 **princessa:** ONE OF MY COWORKERS IS HIGH-KEY SINGLE AND DESERVES A DATE, I LOVE HIM PLATONICALLY SO WHEN I SAW A CUTE CLEARLY GAY DUDE I FIGURED I WOULD HELP MY GOOD PAL OUT

 **pidger:** OH MY GOD GENIUS

11:39 pm

 **sharpshooter:** so yeah that’s how i basically died and was raised from the dead

 **samurai:** I can’t believe you’re a zombie

 **sharpshooter:** i know right

 **sharpshooter:** okay so it’s getting late and i have to be like,, alive in class tomorrow bc finals am i right

 **sharpshooter:** not that i don’t enjoy your company ;)

 **samurai:** k

 **samurai:** night

 **sharpshooter:** jeez let me down harshly

 **sharpshooter:** laters!

 **samurai:** good luck

october 5

8:19 am

 **sharpshooter:** i hate math

 **sharpshooter:** why am i here

 **samurai:** are you telling me that you decided to take a subject that you hate at 8 in the morning

 **sharpshooter:** ,,,, it’s possible

 **samurai:** but why

 **sharpshooter:** i have no fucking clue mate

 **samurai:** I mean I take math too but I enjoy it

 **samurai:** I’m going into a space major so I have to like it

 **sharpshooter:** holy shit

 **samurai:** what

 **sharpshooter:** i am Also going into engineering so i can do space

 **samurai:** that is literally such a math heavy major, it’s a main stem thing why

 **sharpshooter:** lissen

 **sharpshooter:** SPACE

 **samurai:** okay that’s fair

 **samurai:** you trying to be an astronaut?

 **sharpshooter:** yes, actually

 **sharpshooter:** gotta do so much for it but i will do it someday

 **samurai:** I believe in you

 **sharpshooter:** aw, thanks babe

 **samurai:** babe?

 **sharpshooter:** just kidding, haha

8:25 am

 **sharpshooter:** i’m dying inside buddy

 **sharpshooter:** pls send help

 **hunkahunka:** You know, math would be easier if you paid attention in class and didn’t text me all the time

 **sharpshooter:** IT’S ACTUALLY NOT MATH THIS TIME

 **hunkahunka:** How else are you spending your Thursday morning then?

 **sharpshooter:** well, long story short, there was a wrong number mix up and now i’m texting this dude

 **sharpshooter:** i’m already pining hunk

 **hunkahunka:** Oh no.

 **sharpshooter:** like, it’ll go away i’m sure, we won’t actually keep up this weird friendship we have going but we literally talked for like two hours and i like him a lot

 **hunkahunka:** Oh boy

 **sharpshooter:** i miss uuuuuuuuuuuuu

 **hunkahunka:** I miss you too, my man<3 have you talked to Pidge about this?

 **sharpshooter:** no they’ll make fun of me

 **hunkahunka:** I will threaten them for you

 **sharpshooter:** hhhh love u bud

 **hunkahunka:** I love you too!

8:32 am

 **hunkahunka:** Idk if he’ll do it soon or not, but if Lance comes to you with his problems and you make fun of him, no brownies, cookies, or cake for a long time. And I mean a long time.

 **pidger:** jesus fuckin christ alright no need to jump to conclusions

 **hunkahunka:** I miss you! I hope that Arus is treating you well!

 **pidger:** aww buddy i hope balmera is going well too<3

 **pidger:** and shayyyyyyyyyyyy

 **hunkahunka:** Shhhh!!! I’m busy trying to deny my feelings

 **pidger:** okay, okay, pls don’t take away my food <3

 **hunkahunka:** As long as you behave <3

12:42 pm

 **sharpshooter:** who would win

 **sharpshooter:** 7 chickens

 **sharpshooter:** or one massive moth

 **samurai:** what the fuck

 **samurai:** how did you even get here

 **sharpshooter:** it’s a long story involving three cups of coffee, dungeons & dragons, and some brownies that were probably spiked

 **samurai:** there’s a story here and i’m not sure if i want to know it

 **sharpshooter:** just answer the question

 **samurai:** as much as a giant moth is terrifying and would probably send you into immense chills if touched

 **samurai:** chickens are vicious

 **samurai:** I think the 7 chickens would win

 **sharpshooter:** i disagree

 **sharpshooter:** fucking moths are terrifying, there’s a reason moth memes were so popular

 **samurai:** moth memes?

 **sharpshooter:** don’t tell me that you don’t like memes

 **samurai:** I rarely look at anything that has memes, my roommate who is basically a tech genius hates me for it, but I’m too lazy for social media

 **sharpshooter:** i am disgusted, i am revolted, i dedicated my entire life to our lord and savior jesus christ and THIS is the thanks i get?

 **samurai:** is that a meme

 **sharpshooter:** it’s a vine

 **sharpshooter:** damn you are in need of help

 **sharpshooter:** i’ll send you my best vine compilations

[sharpshooter has sent a link]

[sharpshooter has sent a link]

[sharpshooter has sent a link]

 **samura:** what even are these titles

[sharpshooter has sent a link]

 **samurai:** I’m very confused and honestly I don’t know if I should click on these

 **sharpshooter:** do it, coward

 **samurai:** what if this is how you kidnap me, internet stranger

 **sharpshooter:** r u kidding me

 **sharpshooter:** i thought u trusted me

 **sharpshooter:** i guess not :(

 **samurai:** jesus fine

1:27 pm

 **samurai:** who has this kind of time on their hands

 **sharpshooter:** are you talking about the vine comp makers or the vine makers

 **samurai:** yes

 **sharpshooter:** fair enough

 **sharpshooter:** and idk but i love them

 **sharpshooter:** which one is ur fav

 **samurai:** well, I have to say, the little brother kickstarter one?

 **samurai:** peak humor

 **sharpshooter:** [wild applause] good choice

 **samurai:** gee thanks

1:05 pm

 **samurai:** hey

 **pidger:** yes?

 **samurai:** do you watch vines?

 **pidger:** vines literally make up my personality

 **samurai:** oh

1:08 pm

 **pidger:** are you going to elaborate or

 **samurai:** nope thanks

 **pidger:** rude

1:09 pm

 **pidger:** I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION

 **princessa:** SHOOT

 **pidger:** WHY DID KEITH JUST ASK ME ABOUT VINES

 **pidger:** HE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT MODERN CULTURE

 **princessa:** OH NO

 **princessa:** HE’S BEING CORRUPTED

 **pidger:** SHIT

1:14 pm

 **princessa:** ro it’s working

 **roromance:** what’s working

 **princessa:** lance is texting that kid and they’re getting along

 **roromance:** awh that’s so sweet <3

 **princessa:** apparently keith (the boy) texted pidge about vines after never seeing one before

 **roromance:** oh boy

 **roromance:** what have u gotten lance into, lura :/ a boy that doesn’t watch vines :\

 **princessa:** hopefully keith’s okay tho

 **princessa:** lance can educate him

 **roromance:** yeah alright sure

 **roromance:** i still can’t believe u managed to convince him that u were, in fact, Heterosexual

 **princessa:** I don’t know either but it worked, didn’t it?

 **roromance:** I Guess.

 **princessa:** what, are u jealous

 **roromance:** no?

 **princessa:** this is so cute

 **roromance:** ur literally a lesbian why would i be jealous of a boy

 **princessa:** it’s okay romelle ur the only person i’m looking at ever

 **roromance:** uwu

 **princessa:** uwu

 **roromance:** <3

 **princessa:** <3

october 10

2:03 am

 **sharpshooter:** and i think that’s why i interalize all my problems, because i was never really paid that much attention to as a child

 **sharpshooter:** of course, i love my family, but being the middle child is always tough, you know?

 **samurai:** that’s understandable

 **samurai:** but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to really get it lmao

 **samurai:** I’ve never really been the oldest or the youngest or the middle kid

 **samurai:** that’s what you get for being raised in the foster system

 **sharpshooter:** oh, akira, i’m so sorry

 **sharpshooter:** i didn’t know that

 **samurai:** it’s okay, I found a home eventually, it just took time

 **samurai:** shiro, who is basically my older brother, adopted me when I was sixteen

 **sharpshooter:** wait, shiro like the famous arus grad shiro? pilot shiro? dating adam wright?

 **samurai:** married to him, not dating anymore

 **samurai:** but yeah, that’s him

 **sharpshooter:** holy shit

 **samurai:** I really got lucky, if he didn’t take me in I would have just aged out

 **sharpshooter:** i’m glad you found someone, kira

 **samurai:** and I’m glad you’re coming to terms with your problems and growing past them with the help of your friends

 **sharpshooter:** awwww u DO have a heart!

october 16

5:02 pm

 **samurai:** how was english?

 **sharpshooter:** damn, right on time, aren’t you, if it were anyone else i would be wondering why they memorized my schedule

 **sharpshooter:** lots of hw

 **sharpshooter:** BUT it’s time for my weekly skype with my friend!!!!!!!

 **samurai:** what are they like?

 **sharpshooter:** well he’s literally sunshine incarnate, i’ve been best friends with him since middle school and i’m platonically in love with him

 **sharpshooter:** but we went to different colleges so i don’t see him as much anymore :(

 **samurai:** that’s sad

 **samurai:** I’m glad you get to see him now, though

 **sharpshooter:** yeah!

 **sharpshooter:** do you have any old pals?

 **samurai:** well, I did a lot of moving around when I was younger, and I’m not the best at making friends

 **samurai:** I have a few friends now but no one I’ve known for years

 **sharpshooter:** sorry if i asked something i shouldn’t have

 **sharpshooter:** didn’t mean to pry

 **samurai:** no, it’s okay

 **samurai:** it’s easier to talk to you, you know? I don’t have to really worry about seeing you in real life lmao

 **sharpshooter:** if this was anyone else talking i would be offended

 **sharpshooter:** but for you akira, i feel flattered

 **samurai:** thanks

 **sharpshooter:** you really don’t mince words, do you

 **samurai:** I guess not

 **samurai:** like I said, I’m not that great at making friends

 **sharpshooter:** didn’t mean it in a bad way, buddy!

 **sharpshooter:** it’s good to have a blunt person in your life

 **samurai:** are

 **samurai:** are we friends now

 **sharpshooter:** well, as good of friends as you can be when you meet online through a wrong code for an app mishap

 **samurai:** haha

 **samurai:** good to know

 **sharpshooter:** yeah

5:24 pm

 **samurai:** shiro

 **t.shiro:** Yes?

 **samurai:** knock off the grammar for once, pls

 **t.shiro:** Are you okay?

 **samurai:** yeahhhh I’m fine

 **samurai:** how do you make friends without being rude

 **t.shiro:** Well, you just have to be yourself

 **t.shiro:** If your friends can’t like you for you, they aren’t you friends

 **samurai:** yeah yeah yeah

 **samurai:** you’re right, like always

 **t.shiro:** Is there someone you’re trying to befriend?

 **samurai:** no

 **t.shiro:** Is it the boy I saw you texting the other day

 **samurai:** nno

 **t.shiro:** Good luck, bro.

 **samurai:** honestly fuck you

5:32 pm

 **t.shiro:** Keith’s making friends.

 **always.wright:** oh really?

 **t.shiro:** He’s texting with some boy.

 **always.wright:** some boy?

 **always.wright:** don’t tell me he’s as disastrous as you are, takashi

 **t.shiro:** Excuse you, I am perfectly functional.

 **always.wright:** yeah sure mr. “i bumped into my crush and tried to say ‘i’m sorry’ and ‘are you okay’ at the same time and ended up saying ‘are you sorry’”

 **t.shiro:** That was one time, Adam.

 **always.wright:** it still happened.

 **t.shiro:** Sigh.

 **t.shiro:** I’m just worried that something will happen and he’ll be all upset again.

 **always.wright:** i know, takashi. but i think he’ll be okay

 **always.wright:** he’s old enough now, he can handle himself

 **t.shiro:** I know that. I just worry.

 **always.wright:** you always worry.

 **t.shiro:** You’re not wrong.

october 17

8:23 am

 **pidger:** when are u free

 **sharpshooter:** uhh all of today

 **pidger:** good bc i want to hang out with u nerd

 **sharpshooter:** aw is this saying u miss me pidgey?

 **pidger:** of course not.

 **sharpshooter:** of course not.

 **pidger:** i’m gonna bring allura and one of my friends u don’t know too tho, is that ok

 **sharpshooter:** yeah sure who are they?

 **pidger:** his name’s keith, he’s a sophomore like u

 **pidger:** my brother knows his brother so we get along

 **sharpshooter:** nice

 **pidger:** do u,, do u know anyone in ur grade named keith?

 **sharpshooter:** i don’t think so

 **pidger:** huh

 **pidger:** well meet us at altea around 3

 **sharpshooter:** bet

8:34 am

 **pidger:** keith

 **samurai:** pidge

 **pidger:** we’re gonna hang out today

 **samurai:** okay?

 **pidger:** me, u, and two of my moots, lance and allura

 **samurai:** hold up

 **samurai:** allura?

 **samurai:** the one who gave me the wrong number?

 **pidger:** that was a misunderstanding that she doesn’t care to explain and are u rlly mad that u met whatshisname

 **samurai:** leandro and fine maybe

 **pidger:** oh

 **pidger:** btw does he know ur real name?

 **samurai:** well technically yes, I told him to call me akira

 **pidger:** huh inch resting

 **samurai:**?

 **pidger:** nothing

 **pidger:** just meet me at altea building around 3 pm

 **samurai:** k

8:49 am

 **pidger:** ALLURA

 **princessa:** PIDGE

 **pidger:** FIRST OF ALL, ME AND YOU AND LANCE AND KEITH ARE GOING TO HANG OUT TODAY AT 3 MEET US AT ALTEA

 **princessa:** YEAH OKAY BUT LANCE AND KEITH????

 **pidger:** HERE’S THE THING

 **pidger:** THEY USED ALIBIS

 **pidger:** LANCE SAID HIS NAME IS LEANDRO AND KEITH SAID HIS NAME IS AKIRA

 **pidger:** BOTH OF WHICH AREN’T TECHNICALLY WRONG BUT I’M LOSING MY MIND

 **princessa:** AND THEY SAY WLW CAN’T FUNCTION

 **pidger:** BUT YEAH BE PREPARED

 **princessa:** YEAH SURE OKAY

10:41 am

 **pidger:** hunk

 **hunkahunka:** Yeah

 **pidger:** how busy are u today

 **hunkahunka:** I have a class from 1-2

 **pidger:** does ur car have gas

 **hunkahunka:** Yes?

 **pidger:** come down it’s a friday and me, lance, keith, and allura are gonna mess around bc we haven’t had a group fun time in forever

 **hunkahunka:**!!!!!

 **hunkahunka:** I would love to! What time?

 **pidger:** around 3

 **hunkahunka:** I might be a little late but I’ll come! I’ll stay with someone this evening too

 **pidger:** lance’s roommate is out a lot so it’ll probably be fine, but if not u can stay with keith and i

 **hunkahunka:** Now, is Keith...

 **pidger:** yes but lance doesn’t know it

 **hunkahunka:**?

 **pidger:** they both used their real names (leandro for lance and akira for keith)

 **hunkahunka:** Oh my god. This is going to be fun

 **pidger:** yup

2:12 pm

 **princessa:** PIDGE

 **pidger:** ALLURA

 **princessa:** CAN I BRING MY GIRLFRIEND

 **pidger:** ROMELLE?

 **princessa:** YEAH

 **pidger:** GO FOR IT U FUNKY LESBEAN

 **princessa:** <3

2:56 pm

 **pidger:** hurry up little bitch everyone else is here

 **samurai:** jesus christ I’m COMING

 **pidger:** that’s what she said

 **samurai:** shut the fuck up

9:31 pm

 **sharpshooter:** did you do this

 **pidger:** what

 **sharpshooter:** get hunk to come

 **pidger:** yes

 **sharpshooter:** i love u lil pidgeotto

 **pidger:** ,,,,emotions,,,,,,,,,

 **sharpshooter:** oh cmon u like me

 **pidger:** in an annoying older brother sort of way

 **sharpshooter:** i’m screenshotting this it’s so sweet

 **pidger:** shut up

 **sharpshooter:** thank u tho i missed my number one man

 **pidger:** btw what did u think of keith

 **sharpshooter:** ugh

 **sharpshooter:** he’s so emo and honestly what even is his hair

 **pidger:** huh

 **sharpshooter:** you say “huh” whenever you’re plotting

 **pidger:** huh

 **sharpshooter:** stop that

 **sharpshooter:** also ALLURA AND ROMELLE ARE SO CUTE

 **pidger:** I AGREE

 **pidger:** they are both able to be the strong knight to the other’s princess within seconds it’s beautiful

 **sharpshooter:** lesbians are so powerful

 **sharpshooter:** also like,,, i feel like u me and ro have that whole trans solidarity going on

 **pidger:** hell yeah

 **sharpshooter:** our whole little circle is just the entire community i guess

 **pidger:** the gay truly travel in packs

10:08 pm

 **sharpshooter:** i had such a good night man

 **sharpshooter:** how are you doing?

 **samurai:** eh

 **samurai:** I met some new people and they were okay, I was just overwhelmed

 **sharpshooter:** not a people person?

 **samurai:** definitely not

 **sharpshooter:** valid

 **sharpshooter:** see i desire human contact 24/7, please love me

 **samurai:** you don’t seem like the kind of person who needs more friends

 **samurai:** you know so many people

 **sharpshooter:** but i’m only really good friends with a few people

 **sharpshooter:** and some of them i rarely see

 **sharpshooter:** but!! right now i’m actually cuddling with hunk bc he stopped by and god i missed this man

 **samurai:** hunk?

 **sharpshooter:** oh, i must not have told you his name

 **sharpshooter:** he’s the sunshine friend i was telling you about a while back!! my best dude

 **samurai:** nnice

 **sharpshooter:** well speaking of, hunk is telling me to turn off my phone so i’ll talk to you later!!

 **samurai:** bye

10:16 pm

 **samurai:** uhh pidge the big guy who came from balmera u was named hunk right

 **pidger:** yes?

 **samurai:** shit

10:27 pm

[pidger has sent an image]

 **princessa:** OH NO

 **pidger:** I’M SCARED

10:29 pm

 **pidger:** u,, u wanna elaborate there buddy

 **samurai:** what ethnicity is lance

 **pidger:** cuban?

 **samurai:** SHIT

 **pidger:** oh no

 **samurai:** oh no what

 **pidger:** did u know that when lance moved here so he could go to the garrison after college, he chose a different name?

 **samurai:**???

 **pidger:** his name is leandro

 **samurai:** i

10:32 pm

 **pidger:** KEITH KNOWS

 **pidger:** THIS IS NOT A DRILL

 **princessa:** OH SHIT THIS IS GONNA BE A TRAIN WRECK

10:33 pm

 **samurai:** you knew?

 **pidger:** i wasn’t exactly sure how to tell u

 **samurai:** fair enough

 **samurai:** ,,, that’s really leandro?

 **pidger:** yeah allura tried to set lance up bc she thought he would like u

 **samurai:** this gets worse and worse the more you talk

 **pidger:** yeah

 **samurai:** well time to throw myself into the sun and never tell leandro about this

 **samurai:** lance

 **pidger:** do,, do u like him

 **samurai:** no

 **pidger:** really

 **samurai:** no

 **pidger:** mmhm

 **pidger:** i wish u like, disaster

 **samurai:** thanks

october 20

9:28 am

[sharpshooter has sent an image]

 **sharpshooter:** i saw this and thought of you

 **samurai:** what,, what the fuck is that

 **sharpshooter:** it’s a fun, accurate texas meme!!!1!!!1!!111!

 **samurai:** you have no proof that I ever lived in texas, why do you do this to me

 **sharpshooter:** anyone who says y’ain’t in this day and age deserves it

4:20 pm

 **sharpshooter:** blaze it

 **samurai:** do you have to say this every single day

 **sharpshooter:** absolutely i am legally obligated to

 **samurai:** sounds about right

 **sharpshooter:** by the way dude if you don’t mind

 **sharpshooter:** what time do you have english

 **samurai:** tuesdays and thursdays from 4 to 5

 **sharpshooter:** wait so that’s how you know what time the class ends?? omg

 **sharpshooter:** you’re in my class

 **samurai:** yeah I figured that out a while ago

 **sharpshooter:** are you implying you know my secret identity????????

 **samurai:** no

 **samurai:** I just realized that for an hour you finally shut up

 **sharpshooter:** r00d

 **samurai:** whoops

 **sharpshooter:** but yeah that means i might see u later today omg

 **samurai:** I guess so

 **sharpshooter:** stop that i’ve been trying to decipher your identity since we met

 **sharpshooter:** i wanna know what u look like okay

 **samurai:** maybe not today

 **sharpshooter:** yeah okay sorry

 **samurai:** it’s okay just

 **sharpshooter:** i know haha it’s all good

4:27 pm

 **sharpshooter:** aaaa

 **hunkahunka:** Aaaa?

 **sharpshooter:** hunk why do i fuck everything up

 **hunkahunka:** you don’t!!!

 **sharpshooter:** hhhh i think akira hates meeeeee

 **hunkahunka:** Akira as in the boy you were texting the other night?

 **sharpshooter:** take a wild fucking guess

 **hunkahunka:** Why would he hate you?

 **sharpshooter:** i ask too many questions and i force myself onto him and he obviously isn’t interested

 **hunkahunka:** :(

 **hunkahunka:** You are a perfect human being and I love you.

 **sharpshooter:** aww <3 but even though you love me that doesn’t mean akira does

 **hunkahunka:** If Akira doesn’t like you, he is wrong and not worth your time.

 **sharpshooter:** hhhh ok thank u buddy ily

 **hunkahunka:** Ily2 Lance!

4:36 pm

 **hunkahunka:** We have an emergency

 **pidger:** yes?

 **hunkahunka:** Lance thinks he messed up and that Akira/Keith hates him

 **pidger:** is that why keith has his face pressed into a pillow currently

 **hunkahunka:** I mean, probably

 **pidger:** i’ll handle it

 **hunkahunka:** Thank you Pidgey <3

 **pidger:** yeah yeah love u too

4:38 pm

 **pidger:** yo since u don’t talk to people and ur currently buried under blankets

 **samurai:** I beg your pardon

 **pidger:** tell lance that you appreciate him still

 **pidger:** he gets insecure and idk what brought it about but he’s upset about smth u two were talking about

 **samurai:** I

 **samurai:** oh

 **samurai:** okay

4:40 pm

 **samurai:** hey

 **samurai:** it’s not because of anything you said, or anything, I’m just a private person and I don’t want to ruin this thing we have going on

 **samurai:** not revealing identities, I mean

 **samurai:** sorry

4:40

[sharpshooter has sent an image]

 **sharpshooter:**?????????

 **hunkahunka:** aww that’s so sweet

 **sharpshooter:** how did he know??? nothing against him but akira’s about as observant as a rock

 **hunkahunka:** his leandro senses must have been tingling

 **sharpshooter:** yeah okay

4:42 pm

 **sharpshooter:** i

 **sharpshooter:** thanks

 **sharpshooter:** it’s okay i know you didn’t mean to be rude

 **samurai:** good

 **sharpshooter:** i don’t want to ruin this either

 **samurai:** good

 **sharpshooter:** okay that’s enough emotions let me find a meme to break this tension

 **samurai:** oh my god.

october 22

9:54 am

 **pidger:** hey u disaster gay

 **pidger:** i want to hang out with pals and i know u have nothing going on

 **pidger:** u, me, and lance are gonna hang out

 **samurai:** no

 **pidger:** you would dare to oppose me

 **samurai:** I can take you

 **pidger:** yeah, sure, and I’ll leak all your texts

 **samurai:** fine

9:57 am

 **pidger:** hey, wanna hang out?

 **sharpshooter:** sure, what are we gonna do

 **pidger:** i dunno i didn’t think i would get this far

 **sharpshooter:** mood

 **sharpshooter:** we could see a movie?

 **pidger:** bet sounds good to me

 **pidger:** btw keith is coming too bc he has no friends and i want him to make more friends

 **sharpshooter:** ugh

 **sharpshooter:** mullet?

 **pidger:** yah

 **sharpshooter:** fine

11:38 am

 **sharpshooter:** why did you make us sit together

 **pidger:** it was entirely unplanned

 **sharpshooter:** also,, when can we do this again bc he isn’t a horrible movie watcher

 **pidger:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **sharpshooter:** hush

11:38

 **samurai:** pidge he’s so cute

 **samurai:** he was whisper-yelling the iconic lines and he kept throwing popcorn at my face

 **pidger:** get out of here with your _feelings_

 **pidger:** heathen

october 23

8:07 am

 **sharpshooter:** happy 3-week-anniversary!

 **samurai:** thanks?

 **sharpshooter:** we’ve officially been texting since your chaotic wrong number three weeks ago

 **samurai:** I wonder how that girl is doing now

 **sharpshooter:** i wonder how she managed to mess up her own school code

 **samurai:** idk man

 **samurai:** good luck to you, allura, wherever you are

 **sharpshooter:** allura?

 **samurai:** yeah, I think it must be a common name because I know two of them including coffee shop girl

 **sharpshooter:** inch resting

8:12 am

 **sharpshooter:** hey lura

 **sharpshooter:** sweetheart

 **sharpshooter:** darling

 **sharpshooter:** beauty

 **princessa:** Yes Lance?

 **sharpshooter:** why would you, a lesbian with a girlfriend, try to give your number to a boy?

 **princessa:** I beg your pardon?

 **sharpshooter:** don’t try to tell me you don’t know what i’m talking about

 **princessa:** Oh, dear. Well. I suppose I must explain myself.

8:12 am

 **samurai:** hey pidge

 **pidger:** why are u texting me at this unholy hour

 **samurai:** how common of a name is allura?

 **pidger:** ,,,,why do u ask

 **samurai:** I assumed that coffee shop allura and allura with gf romelle were different ppl but I feel like I was very incorrect and I just gravely fucked up

 **pidger:** oh my fucking god,, did u even look at allura when she served u at the coffee shop?

 **samurai:** no?? I’m gay, pidge

 **pidger:** why are men so dumb

 **samurai:** thanks

8:18 am

 **sharpshooter:** i’m vaguely overwhelmed

 **princessa:** I’m sorry.

 **sharpshooter:** so you know who akira is, though

 **princessa:** Yes, but I don’t know if I should be the one to tell you.

 **sharpshooter:** i guess that’s fair.

 **sharpshooter:** you really thought i was so lonely that you tried to set me up?

 **princessa:** I just wanted you to be happy!

 **sharpshooter:** i love you but you’re on thin fucking ice.

 **princessa:** :*

8:26 am

 **samurai:** I may have made a slight error

 **sharpshooter:** yeahhhh

 **samurai:** apparently the two alluras I know are, in fact, the same person

 **sharpshooter:** yeahhhhh

 **samurai:** and I think you know who she is

 **sharpshooter:** yes sir

 **samurai:** well,,

 **sharpshooter:** no i don’t know who you are, allura won’t tell

 **samurai:** that’s unfair, considering I know who you are

 **sharpshooter:** how long??? how?

 **samurai:** just a few days ago, when we all were hanging out and you mentioned hunk

 **sharpshooter:** wait holy shit

 **sharpshooter:** are you implying that you are, in fact, the mullet himself

 **samurai:** that is not how I would put it

 **sharpshooter:** whatever

 **sharpshooter:** you’re keith?

 **samurai:** and you’re lance

 **sharpshooter:** holy shit

8:35

 **samurai:** I’m sorry I have absolutely no idea how to handle this

 **sharpshooter:** neither do i, it’s okay

 **samurai:** I have to say though

 **sharpshooter:** oh?

 **samurai:** you’re actually pretty funny

 **samurai:** and attractive, even if you’re annoying

 **sharpshooter:** oh h ?

 **samurai:** and I kind of like you

 **sharpshooter:** ooh my god

 **sharpshooter:** well

 **samurai:** sorry

 **sharpshooter:** stop apologizing

 **sharpshooter:** let’s just say

 **sharpshooter:** a mullet is a terrible fashion choice

 **sharpshooter:** but it is quite fun to throw popcorn at it

 **sharpshooter:** and you have no idea how to text

 **sharpshooter:** but i have fun anyway

 **sharpshooter:** i think i like you a little too, my ddude

 **samurai:** shit

 **samurai:** what do we do now

 **sharpshooter:** i’m not sure man but something good probably

9:23 am

 **sharpshooter:** hunk i think i have a boyfriend now

 **hunkahunka:** I beg your fucking pardon.

3:49 pm

 **pidger** has added **sharpshooter** , **samurai** , **hunkahunka** , **princessa** , and **roromance** to the chat.

 **pidger** has named the chat **be gay do crime**.

 **pidger:** welcome

 **pidger:** i can finally have a fucking groupchat now that keith and lance got their shit together

 **sharpshooter:** rude

 **samurai:** thanks so much pidge

 **samurai:** I’m gonna steal your robot

 **pidger:** don’t you dare

 **pidger:** but yeah here’s the gay group chat that’s all folks

 **roromance:** i’m honored to be included!!

 **princessa:** I am glad to have played my part in helping the disasters get together.

 **hunkahunka:** I am still quite overwhelmed but I am proud of Lance all the same

 **sharpshooter:** why do hunk and lura text so formal, calm down guys

 **princessa:** No

 **hunkahunka:** No

 **pidger:** powerful

3:55 pm

 **sharpshooter:** hey hey hey

 **samurai:** what

 **sharpshooter:** thanks for putting up with me

 **samurai:** oh

 **samurai:** I don’t put up with you but you’re welcome

 **samurai:** and thanks for listening to me

 **sharpshooter:** no problem buddy

 **sharpshooter:** also, i just wanted to make sure you weren’t overwhelmed by the gc or anything

 **sharpshooter:** you mentioned that crowds make you a little anxious a while back

 **samurai:** oh

 **samurai:** I’m okay

 **samurai:** thank you, lance

 **sharpshooter:** no problem <3

 **samurai:** ,,,

 **samurai:** <3


End file.
